the nothingness ...................

well of late i feel empty....not in the gastronomic sense but a void of feelings and emotions...feel as though i dont feel anything anymore......it seems such a drag to go on living like this......the all encompassing black hole of a heart sucking in every drop of............... you know........blood........the eyes which see selfishness everywhere.....even in the teacup where the monster of milk mixed with leaves sublimate the existence of the sugar cubes....sleep is strange......it is when the sane mind rests and when the inner eye is restless....churning up images that you suppress in the day they walk out of you like semi-human zombies and terrorise the neighbourhood................. .the merciless clock ticks life away.....swinging its swords to the noon of armageddon...or is it midnight?it cant be midnight.....for midnight is a misnomer...a sham...a fake fakir numbimg our senses to the passage of time.....fooling us to a false sense of security...that half the night is still there.........but ask the owls and their human morphs....they will tell you how time accelerates after the closed hand namaste of the midnight hour ..................................

suddenly there is light......not the natural but the electric....."rajat you allright? you have been screaming in your sleep....you are always such a peaceful sleeper.....a bad dream??" the human form of my dad speaks as if from far away.....i finally come to my senses...."ummm...ya its ok..." the light is switched off and there is silence once again.....i stare out the window into the shimmering night sky and hear the occasional flutter of wings from the birds in the trees........then i see them........ a pair of shimmering diamonds....in front of me on the window sill......i imagine 2 stars staring me in the face.......i open my mouth to scream and all i hear is deafening silence.......maybe not all zombies-of-the-night go away when you wake up.................................