Wednesday, February 28, 2007

I see faith in your eyes
Never you hear the discouraging lies
I hear faith in your cries
Broken is the promise, betrayal
The healing hand held back by the deepened nail

Follow the God that failed.......

lyrics from METALLICA's landmark Black album .The song was inspired by the death of James Hetfield's (the lead singer) mother from cancer; she was a member of the Church of Christ,Scientist and therefore refused treatment.It speaks of his anguish in seeing his mother die without seeking medical help of any kind and it brings out very poignantly the eternal battle between religion and science.Though I do not approve of this particular branch of Christianity,I am a believer.....of Hindu philosophies.'belief' is more of a word which I use out of force of habit,my 'belief' is more of a logical conclusion and my religious beliefs do not conflict with my scientific knowledge.I know I should really do a detailed post about all of this...but my mind is totally numbed by a whole day of Perl programming and SQL querying.The reason I have been thinking about this is that in the space of 2 days I have had two people tell me that they would rather agree to disagree with me than have me speak on length about religion/spirituality.It so happens that most of my closest friends are atheists or agnostic.There is Sam,Deb,my roommate(though he wouldn't admit it),Ankita and of course K. Nikhil if you are reading this....I have never asked you dude...what beliefs do you have?and yes let me make it clear that I am perfectly at ease with what people believe and what they do not.I am not out to convert people to my school of thought.But it sometimes makes me think,why is 'belief' as in religion always equated with 'illogical' thinking and 'stupidity'?

Right now I am thinking about a lot of things at the same time...like how Metallica lyrics so damn always nail the point that they are trying to make,how my life is so freaking turbulent right now, how this sem god has kept me occupied to the hilt,how Bangalore is such a strange place that I can feel neither disgust nor love for it....

P.S:I am a big-big sucker for music lyrics ok?this is the only form of poetry I enjoy.peace.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

The post he did for someone else.

Asterix-modernism-Darjeeling-Tsangu lake-morning three roses tea-77E-60's earrings-Sophie's choice?-Steinbeck-Makkalakoota-1st year fest-agony-depression-zany haircuts-the wasted 3.5 years of engineering-emails-post-modernism-suduko-regret-Kannada kali-Zidane-margaritas-milk-Karl Marx's beard-French-ESI bus stop-Queen's-42/8-Chord road walks-Yahoo messenger-Hari Sarvottama-To kill a mockingbird-can I be anonymous?-rose garden road(Nanda road)-accidents-cappuccino-stalker bitches/fatsos-black-Alphonso mangoes-old Hindi songs-Grey's anatomy-Goa-Southpark-agnosticism-Vedanta-giving up on 1st kriya-by the window-'don't send me forwards'-somewhere between two layouts-Midnight's children. and whatever happens...........that sums up about everything.

Friday, February 09, 2007

There is this incredible radio station on Yahoo Launchcast...a new one called Guitar Gods and words are not enough to describe its brilliance... Metallica,Sabbath,Satriani,Aerosmith,Deep Purple,Van Halen one after the other ...mesmeric.The sad thing about Yahoo Radio is that it does not run in Firefox..only IE.I read The Catcher in The Rye in the hols and was not too impressed.it is a nice book,the New-York lingo of the '50s is really appealing and I really liked Holden's idea of 'phoniness'...and how inadvertently he himself morphs into one...but was not ground-breaking in any way I thought.Guess I have a weakness for longer works of literature...small works don't leave much of an impression on me for some reason...


missing hostel and the ensuing hullabaloo and really miss laughing my guts out...haven't done that for quite a looooong time.feel like racking my head on a really hard quiz or a crossword.college is going to end in about 3 months...and it is ending in a very chaotic and hateful way....like a downward spiral ....anti-nostalgic with a bitter after-taste...and strangely I feel like a spectator in my own life...and don't feel sad about this...watching it unfold almost like a book.

My blog is not heading in any well defined direction...ends up being a rant post after post,so from now I vow to stick by coherence and humor....cross my heart etc

Monday, February 05, 2007

Jaded

The world has changed.My world....and can no longer claim the immunity of an innocuous whippersnapper.........and feel depressed.'bcoz of the chicken pox---the bland diet to be followed---the inseparable boredom--the lack of meaningful conversations----and not being good enough for anything...for quizzing ,for love, for acads....life should only be uphill from here...surely

I am Jack's indecisiveness wrapped in a sheath of fatalistic tendencies